Every summer it happens. With minimum warning and fanfare, TV suddenly becomes a ‘blokes only zone’, matches are played with pomp and honour, and silence must reign in case one was to miss an all important stumble or kick. Of course, this tends to only apply to the non football fan, as it is fine for the fan themselves to groan, grasp and burp their way through unseasonabley long games. There are banners in every pub, glowing footballs in the supermarkets and dubious songs on the radio.
People speak in hushed tones about ‘football widows’ those poor aimless creatures who are left on the shelf and have to retire from any partner based activity till the season is over. A widow refers to anyone partnered with fan, so it can equally go the other way (and yes, I agree that’s a sexist term, but that’s not the point I’m making now).
These poor pathetic football widows must spend the football time crawling through ASOS online and trying to find outfits that will entice their no good halves away from the screen, for just a short while.
Really? Like, really? I understand that if you’re ACTUALLY A PLAYER then yes, your partner will get short shrift in the season, but as for all the fans, uh uh. If you’re into the game enough to forgo any sort of fun with your partner, then what the hell are you doing with them? You shouldn’t absolve yourself of all priorities when you get in a relationship, but putting TV over them, c’mon?
Then again, what is this with the talk of wailing widows and lost women? Are you really happy in a relationship where you’re ignored to this extent? A harmonious relationship should involve both give and take, and if you love them, you’ll not begrudge them TV time for some key matches. Sure, if they collapse on the couch for a month you may have to rethink this policy, but a couple of nights a week is no biggy. Isn’t that how much time you’d spend apart anyway?
Problems occur when women start to resent the time spent on TV, men resent the fact they’re resented and a vicious circle of demands and unhappiness ensues. You’re only a football widow if you allow yourself to be in a relationship that fosters this, and a happy couple would NEVER put each other in this potion.
A very close friend of mine is obsessed with football and has held a season ticket for years, and most weekends in the season goes off and leaves his lovely girlfriend at home. Does she hate this? No, she loves him for all that he is, and though she may miss him, revels in the fact he gets so much enjoyment out of something she finds so bizarre- and uses the time off to see her other mates. In return? Well, the weekend of some big matches he’s off kayaking in the country, far from any TV… Give and take, see?
So here’s my final word on the subject- there’s no such thing as football widows, only people who have allowed themselves to get involved in demoralizing unsatisfying situations. Before the Mail starts spouting off about the poor ‘ol wifey left at home alone, I’ll pre-emptively say BOLLOCKS to that.